I'm going to answer the questions that I actually get asked the most, rather than use this FAQ post as a clever device to answer the questions that no one's asking even though I want to answer them.
Why do you spell your business name that way (Yew vs You)?
In short, it's a reference to the Yew tree which was sacred to my Celtic ancestors. It symbolizes transformation, regeneration, and rebirth which I thought was very appropriate to the type of work I do.
And also, I really like the wordplay.
What the [Bleep] are Ninja Sessions?
They're appointments that I offer to current clients (only!) at times I'm not normally open, like (some) Saturdays or (some) Holidays. They're also stealthy because I only publicize them up to one week in advance on social media and in the open appointment email I send out weekly (you can sign up right on your intake form... I'm just saying). Because they're only offered to current clients, they're not listed online and are only available by emailing or texting me.
Why does your service menu have so few things on it?
For two reasons. First, I like to keep things simple. Second, it reflects the way I work. I mix and match techniques based on your issues and how your body responds to the work I'm doing.
Do you accept tips?
Yes, with this caveat: While tips are appreciated, they are never expected. I work for myself, so I set my prices where I need them to be. Because I don't expect or rely on tips, I do NOT have a tip line available when you pay by credit card. If you'd like to leave a tip on your credit card, simply tell me before I run your card and I will add it in manually. If you still carry it, I also accept cash as well.
Why won't you go as deep as I want? (i.e. Why won't you make it hurt?)
Simple answer: Physiology. The only way a muscle can protect itself is to contract. Since we're trying to achieve the opposite result, massaging to the point of pain is counterproductive. Bonus: By not causing a protective contraction and then using even more pressure to counter it, the amount of next day soreness you might experience is greatly reduced.
I'm sensitive to light/smells/sounds. Is your office sensory friendly?
Yes. I'm neurodivergent and have some sensory issues of my own so I make sure my office is as welcoming as possible to as many people as possible. If you have sensory aids, you are always welcome to bring them if you think you may need or want to use them.
Lights: The lights in my office will be very dim the entire time you're in there. Should you need more light after your session to find something in your wallet/purse or something you dropped, the overhead lights have been dimmed by pretty scarves and will only be on long enough for you to find what you need.
Smells: I never diffuse essential oils in my office but I do occasionally use essential oils on a client. However... The HEPA filter in my office has odor removing capabilities and circulates the air in my office 4 times per hour. I also leave a full hour between clients for cleaning and resetting (both the room and myself). There should be no trace of previously used oils in the air by the time you arrive.
Sounds: The only sounds you'll hear are the HEPA filter and the soft, relaxing music that's playing. You are always welcome to ask me to adjust the music volume in either direction and to turn down the fan on the HEPA filter if either are too loud for you .
That said, my office is in a suite with 8 other businesses and a large common area which I have very little control over. Here's what I can tell you about the sensory environment of the common area:
Sound: My suite is very quiet. Occasionally, someone in one of the other offices speaks loudly enough to be heard in the waiting area, but the sound heard in the waiting area is not above the sound of someone sitting across the room from you.
Lights: There are overhead fluorescent lights throughout the suite but they are enclosed and shine up toward the ceiling so their light is not shining directly on you. There are 2 incandescent wall sconces in the waiting area as well. If you are especially sensitive to lights or if fluorescent lights give you migraines or seizures, you are more than welcome to wear protective eyewear such as sunglasses while you wait for your appointment. I strive to be on time or a bit early so unless you are really early you should have very little wait time.
Smells: The common area of the suite very rarely has a discernible smell. A very occasional faint food smell may be present around lunch time, but I'm the only one I've ever seen use the kitchenette and I keep the highly aromatic foods at home.
Why don't you do hot stone massage or other spa services?
Because I don't enjoy doing spa services.
Do you do couples massage?
No. I'm only one person so I can't work on two people at once. Also, I don't have the room in my office to do two massages at once and I don't particularly like doing them anyway.
Will you volunteer to do massage at my event?
Probably not. Large events are overstimulating to me and I only volunteer my services to charities I personally support. But even then, I'm usually volunteering some other way... not by giving massage at an event.
Can I hire you to do chair massage at my business/event?
No. I don't like doing chair massage and it's not a good representation of my massage skills.
Can I make an appointment for a day you're not open?
Not unless I'm offering Ninja Sessions that day and you have access to that knowledge by being a current client.
Do you ever plan to be open more days per week?
Yes, but only as additional days are sustainable.
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